Misadventures of a 20-Something Mom: October 2015   

Thursday, October 22, 2015

To My BFF on her Wedding Day




To my best friend, on her wedding day,

I know you’ll look beautiful. No matter the circumstance, you always have.

Whether you were all dolled up for one of our (albeit infrequent) nights on the town, or just nursing a hangover the next day, you’ve always been radiant. Inside and out. It was your friendly smile and ridiculous sense of humor that initially drew me to you 13.5 years ago. Being the shy, new kid on the block in high school, translated to me frequently feeling lost, misunderstood, and completely out of place. I found a place with you. I’m guessing you picked up that compassionate tendency to shepherd the strays from your mom, because you quickly took me in, befriended me and never looked back.

Over the years, we have shared all sorts of ups and downs together. From celebrating academic, and later, career-related successes, to mending broken hearts from piece of shit boys that were never worth our time anyways. Situations and circumstances perpetually changed, but our friendship never did.

Back when we were just teens, I remember the many sleepovers we spent, chatting into the wee hours of the morning about our hopes and dreams for the future. You were going to be a doctor. Follow your passion and have a thriving practice where you got to work with children all day. A life long dream. Then, you’d go home to your own handsome, loving husband and slew of adorable, little Greek babies. I, on the other hand, would live wild, and fast, and free. I was going to be solely a career woman. Answer to no one. I would be my own boss; with neither the time, energy, nor inclination to be strapped down by the confines of motherhood, marriage, or obligation.

Clearly, somewhere along the line, your unwavering emphasis on family, eternal drive and unfaltering sense of responsibility must’ve rubbed off on me. Because before I knew it, I, the feminist version of Peter Pan, was the one settling down, getting married, and having babies.

And you know what? You were right all along, sister. I’ve never been happier.

So today, I have no sage advice to offer the old soul who’s had it all figured out from the start. But just like those sleepovers years ago, I still have plenty of hopes and dreams. As for the wedding day itself, I hope you don’t stress about the tiny details. It goes by so fast. Just relax, remember what the day is really about, and take it all in.

Once you and your Prince Charming tie the knot, I hope that you two remember that you’re forever on the same team. Always fight fair but forget that bullshit about never going to bed angry. Better that, than someone ending up in a body bag.

When the honeymoon is over, literally and figuratively, it's easy to get caught up in the stress and drudgery of everyday life. Even when he’s exhibiting one of the many irritating or disgusting man habits, like forgetting to flush, drinking from the carton, or being a shitty listener, and you really want to beat him with a wiffle bat, try and focus on his positive traits instead. The things you fell in love with. While arguably, the wiffle bat is temporarily gratifying, it’s better for the long haul if you can refrain. Though, if that isn’t feasible, you know I’ll always be here to help you make up an alibi .

I hope that you get all the beautiful babies you’ve dreamed of since we were still kids ourselves. Though, now that you’ve seen this circus I call a family, you might be reconsidering just how many beautiful babies you might want. If and when the little bundles of joy finally arrive, you have my number. Remember, I’m totally down for newborn snuggles if you want to tap out for awhile.

Most of all, I hope you know, how incredibly excited I am for you to begin a new chapter in what has already been an extraordinary life story. Know that I’ll always be here. Cheering you on from the sidelines and wishing you nothing but love and happiness.

XoXo

Your BFF